How many of you feel weary because you are doing it all?
You are driving all the kids to their activities and in total of charge of your child or children with disabilities?
YOU are the one who is their nurse.
YOU are the one who is their behavior therapist trying to minimize the meltdowns.
YOU are the one who is their speech therapist helping them to speak.
YOU are the one who is their occupational therapist helping them with sensory struggles.
Whew, I am tired just writing all this down.
Well, if you are the caretaker of your child then you can understand.
I am that type of mom.
The type who takes it all on. Every single thing. I mean EVERY single thing. I am the queen of multi-tasking. I mean it, maybe even super queen. I keep feeling I can help everyone and do it all. My spiritual gifts are mercy and encouragement. So if there is a need or someone needs help I volunteer. I like to solve problems and make things better with everything.
As I type these words, tears are streaming down my face. The reason I feel emotional is that I see how dangerous this can be but at the same time I understand my heart. I want to help and make it all better.
Let me give you a brief background about me to explain a little bit more.
I am a wife of twenty-seven years and mother to two children, Chelsea (22) and Charlie who has autism and is 16. I am a principal of a special-needs private school. I am a Board Certified Assistant Behavior Analyst. I have parents calling me asking for advice if their child just got diagnosed. I help parents with their IEPs and understanding all things with the law. I help parents equipping them to help their children behaviorally.
Now that we got that out of the way, you can understand my plate is pretty full. I don't mind to be that busy but at some point I will break if I focus on how Patty will help everyone. What I mean is that If I am doing it all for my glory or my need of control, or my need to help everyone I am going about it with the wrong focus.
I often times always say yes. Are you that way? You are super tired, your schedule is packed and someone asks for help and you say yes. I usually take it all on my own. I gather all the things I need to do, how I need to help others, what the list of things will be that I need to fix. Then I will ask God for help. I am sharing this honest reflection of who am I and what I do. I am being vulnerable right now by sharing this. I am doing this all backwards.
I am going about doing things for my will, not God's will. I have placed this quote beside my bed and by my desk at work, "Patty, Get out of my way!"- God I have this to remind me that I am not in control, God is. I need to make sure I don't mess things up by getting in God's Will and His plans.
There are 2 ways to keep you focusing on God's will:
- Be Daily in His Word- Learning about God
One of the key things about being a follower of Christ is that it is a personal relationship. You can't have a personal relationship with someone if you don't spend time with them daily. The closer you are to Christ, by spending time with Him the better you can be in tune with His will. Your Bible should be the book that you read every single day, learning more and more about Christ and His direction in your life.
2. Be in Daily Prayer- Growing close to God
Prayer is an intimate time with God. Being with just you and God talking to Him, thanking him, confessing any sin, and asking God for help. Prayer is a time to get closer to God and feel His presence and love.
When we do these two things we release our tasks and daily life to Him and seek out His will instead of My will. We release all those things as caregivers that we are in charge of.
I just came back from a conference with Lysa TerKeurst and she said, "God loves me too much to answer my prayer at any other time than the right time ... and in any other way than the right way." I want to be in God's perfect will. I want to follow His ways, His plans. I hope you are encouraged today to continue to rest in Him and rely on Him to guide you in your busy life of being a caregiver for your child. He wants to help guide you instead of you guiding yourself. We can't do it on our own. We can't do it without Christ being in the driver seat.
HE will help you be the best nurse.
HE will help you be the best behavior therapist.
HE will help you be the best speech therapist.
HE will help you be the best occupational therapist.
Let him guide you and help you.
I love Hillary Scott's song Thy Will. It is a great reminder to always look to Him each and every single day!