I decided to wear my oldest pair of tennis shoes. When putting them on I noticed an area by my right big toe that had begun to show a lot of wear, but I hadn’t noticed the full extent of that. Walking through puddles and in the rain, I began to notice that my right foot felt cold. Then I could feel my sock getting wet. Indeed it became obvious that there was indeed a hole in my shoe.
In the journey of special needs I’ve sometimes noticed a little too late how much something is affecting me. Little by little over time, I/we keep doing the same thing that seems to have worked for a long while and then what seems like all of a sudden, there is something in the situation that needs to be remedied. In this situation it was simply to change shoes and socks and if needed, a new tennis shoes. That simple choice would lead to changed results. Yet, in the real world of caring for one 24/7 we do things that seem to work and yet at some point we realize it’s not working. Maybe it’s our fatigue level. Maybe it’s not getting out of the house on time. Or perhaps it’s that something just isn’t going as smoothly as it did. Season, times, and methods change and we need to realize we need to change with them to be sure we don’t burn out. Those are the times we can gather our social media connections and ask for help or direction, and even better yet, grabbing a cup of coffee with a real friend in our same life situation who will really understand, and ask advice from them because they know and love us well and have our best interest in mind.
Sometimes what may have been apparent to others (and certainly to God) becomes evident to us that something is wrong. We have a choice to make but sometimes we need help from someone we know and love. The change of life direction in the mind and heart will often result in a changed life. May transformation gradually, yet marvelously take place! No more hiding in the shadows—we step out to live in the light! Admit our failures and things we can’t do alone. Admit what we need. We can ask help of others for them to respond. We can even ask for forgiveness and restore relationships if that is part of this equation of getting out of step.
We need to realize we can teach old dogs new tricks, swap out old shoes for new, and get moving in a new direction that works for us. Ask for help. Change. Move forward. You (and we) can do it!
Dr. Joe and Cindi Ferrini are authors, speakers, and bloggers for several blogging sites on family and special needs. They speak nationally for FamilyLife Weekend To Remember Marriage Get-a-Ways, authored Unexpected Journey – When Special Needs Change our Course, and have been interviewed on Focus on the Family, FamilyLife, and various other radio and television venues. Connect with them at www.cindiferrini.com and social media at: www.facebook.com/cindi.ferrini, www.facebook.com/UnexpectedJourney/, www.facebook.com/MyMarriageMatters/