An Open Letter to a Disability-Friendly Church Leader

Dear leader in a disability-friendly church,

Thank you for caring what the Bible says about inviting and embracing people of all abilities and their families in your church. More than that, thank you for prayerfully seeking to live out the Gospel in Jesus’ way, which is often not a comfortable way at all.

I am the parent of a child with special needs who appreciates you so much. I want you to know that I am praying for you and the team you serve alongside as well as the community where you work and worship.

I understand this is a complicated season to serve in ministry. The pandemic turned your ministry model inside out. Now you’re about to launch a new academic year facing more uncertainty and need for creativity than you ever imagined. You must wake up every morning with heart swelling at all the needs but mind swimming with concerns about falling short. I am trusting that God’s strength will be perfect and very visible through these days when people and church systems are weak.

I want to assure you that I understand much of what you are juggling. Families like ours can be “high maintenance” (at least that’s how my own family sees ourselves). And there you are trying to accommodate a myriad of us, each with our own unique situations. My family, and others like us still need to be very careful about social distancing. While services and community engagement options get sorted out, I’m so grateful that we can learn and worship online. That has actually worked very well for us except for the distance it has created in our relationships. Of course, we’re anxious to find ways for our family to stay connected in our church but we can be patient. We just don’t want to feel forgotten and invisible here at home while we wait. So, I am also praying God will help us all work together in finding solutions that fit our family and our church. We don’t expect perfection but we do hope for progress.

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May God keep you brave and persistent. May He be your strength and confidence. May he reassure you that what you do matters. It matters to the special needs community and it matters to those who witness your advocacy. Other pastors, leaders and volunteers see what you do and they learn. When you feel like you are pushing a boulder uphill, know that I’ve got your back in prayer and appreciation. If there is more I can do, I hope you will reach out. I’m often stretched and may not be able to do as much as I’d like. But I am honored to be asked and I will always pray.

As the primary caregiver for my family, I am often reminded that I cannot say “yes” to everything. I can only care for my family well if I am also well cared-for. I must be well fed—body, mind and spirit. This is a daily balance for me. As you care for so many, I know you need to be well fed, too. Please take good care of yourself. I am praying God will put a growing and supportive team around you. I’ll worship with you while we wait for God’s provision.

Please don’t let yourself get discouraged or burned out. Our church is richer for everyone because of what you do. The world needs you serving where you are!

Gratefully,

The Parent of a Child with Special Needs

Lisa Jamieson is a caregiver consultant, pastoral counsellor and author of popular books and Bible studies including Finding Glory in the Thorns and Jesus, Let’s Talk. Lisa and her husband, Larry, live in Minnesota with the youngest of their three grown daughters, Carly, who has Angelman Syndrome. Together, the Jamiesons founded Walk Right In Ministries in 2008, a non-profit organization building faith and community with special needs families.